Dealing with difficult emotions, or any kind of emotion can be really uncomfortable, even scary, and so a lot of us just avoid emotions all together. We package them up into a little UPS bundle and hurl them back into our nervous system with hopes they will never return. Unfortunately, our nervous system is like an elephant and forgetting about your emotional experience is not an option. You will be reminded, hounded and even harassed by your nervous system until you take your emotions back for proper processing. What is emotions processing anyway, and how can you set up your processing system?
Emotions are tricky things to even identify, let alone process. One thing seems to be clear - you cannot go around emotions, you must go through them. How you go through them however can be done in a variety of ways, ways that may help you get processing sooner than later, thus reducing the unexpected outbursts, somatic suffering and manifestation of various mental illnesses.
In order to process an emotion it helps to know which emotion you are working with. The expression “if you name it you can tame it” applies here. Just naming an emotion, brings some clarity and a sense of peace in the knowing. I recommend using an emotions wheel to work your way to the most specific naming you can achieve. Just google emotions wheel (images) and use your finger to point and name your emotions. Simple, but impactful.
Once you know what you are working with you can start to reduce your emotions to more simple parts for experiencing. You could cry, move, write, talk or express emotions through creative means like drawing or painting. This process might include reflective aspects, present moment awarenesses or applying lessons to future plans.
It takes practice to learn to process emotions and sometimes the help of a therapist or supporter as you deal with some of the suffering or even to witness some of the meaning-making. Processing emotions can be tempting to avoid but also very rewarding to embrace. Eventually we must go through our emotions. To help you manage your mental health and well-being, I recommend taking a conscious and intentional approach with your processing.